Dance Parties!

Dance parties are something strange. There is a primal instinct in all of us to move our bodies to obnoxious rhythms. It helps us relieve stress, have fun, and show off to the opposite sex. Well at this time of the year being Valentine’s Day, there seems to be a lot of those, especially for the singles out there in the United States. I figure dances always occur during this time to help singles out there find their valentine so we do not feel so lonely on this day of days.


This Valentine’s Day weekend I attended two of them myself, either because I just like to dance, socialize and glamorize in all of the attention I can get at them or because I was really bored and wanted something to do. Either way, I had fun!

The first dance I went two actually was at my youngest brother’s school, it happens to be a chartered school and the group who organized it rented it out, one big coincidence. Well thanks to the impersonal event system on Facebook I was invited to the party where my friend was DJing. I arrived there thinking I would run in to at least a few friends since they tend to know the same DJ and are invited to all the same events. Wouldn’t you know it, I did not know anyone there except the DJ. Well, rather than scouring away like a normal person I decided to take this opportunity to meet a lot of new people that I probably would never see again. I had a good time dancing the “All the Single Ladies”, Lady Gaga, the Top 40, and all the other dances. This dance had a lot of people from the same ward there although about 500 people were invited on Facebook, all of them clicking “Maybe” as their status for maybe being at the dance so not to hurt their inviters feelings although I pretty sure the inviters weren’t there either. This ward was about the only group there and so everyone asked me, “Who are you here with?” “Why, I am here just too party friend!” I would respond “I hear that!” They would say back, then I would talk to them for maybe two minutes and then move on to the next person where the same situation would go down. Good times, guaranteed that is the last time I show up at a random dance party without some other friend there I can sucker in going with me.

The next dance party I went to was a lot less awkward, it was put on by my local church congregation and we invited about nine other ward (congregations) over as well. To be honest, Utah Mormon dance parties are lame when it comes to turnout. There was maybe over 900 people invited to this dance and maybe 100 showed up, but that did not stop the people there to have fun! This was a Valentine’s Day dance and there was a lot of great food provided by the Marvellous Catering Company (I recommend them for any wedding, party, corporate event, spoiled sweet-16 party, etc). Several people just busted out the moves, it was a blast. Really, these kind of dance parties are fun. People just go out there and have fun and they do not care if they dance or not. A lot of people need to have that kind of attitude, maybe they cannot dance, but really, what white person can? (the king of pop technically does not count!) and they need to go out there and just have fun! That is how this dance party was and it was great. In the end I got to dance with a few cute girls and realize that the conversation was boring during the dance, so they therefore lost my interest. Seriously, these dance parties between singles ward are made just to find people to date, and I found a cool girl who caught my interest and I got her number. Thinking I was all cool about it, I decided to advertise this to a friend, only to discover he had four numbers from the dance. . . someone is a number hog.

Basically dance parties are fun, when you are not by yourself at a party where you are expecting someone to be there that you know. So just go out there and dance, meet new people, party on, and go crazy. It makes life fun! We all every once in a while need to just flow with the groove and have some fun, dancing will let you do that.

Dating is . . . interesting

Oh dating, what an interesting concept established since the beginning of time, although I’m pretty sure concep

tually it has changed over time. Actually I think it was a lot easier back in the day of the cavemen. When you wanted a women, all you had to do was take a club to her head and drag her all across town by the hair to show you both were now a couple. Anyways, dating is a completely strange yet exciting experience that we all love to hate, and yet we still put ourselves through it.

To me, dating seems like it should be so easy, the process is so simple, sure I am talking from a guy’s perspective but it will have to do. You meet a cute girl, you talk to her for a little bit, you are suddenly interested in her. In the moment you get her number and ask her out. After several dates and you finally get to know the girl, you fall in love, date even more, eventually get engaged and get married. There is a lot to the process, but simple enough nonetheless. Sure it looks simple on paper, but it sure is a lot more complicated than that. You have to ask yourself “does she like me?”, “why does she not answer her phone when I call?”, “is she actually interested in me or just doesn’t know how to say no?”, “what am I doing wrong?”, “when should I take it to the next level?”, etc. Dating is some tricky stuff.

I’ll be honest, before my two-year mission to Brazil, I basically went on three dates and all of them were to high school dances. I wasn’t really interested in dating at all and to tell you the truth, girls had cuties back then! When I got home when I was 21 and my mission president pumped in to my head all sorts of concepts of marriage and my sacred duty to get married, I all of the sudden was interested in dating. Yeah, that was interesting asking a girl out for my first date home. I think I made every mistake in the book, I have progressed a lot since then. My point, dating is a game of practice. When I first got home I had no idea how to ask a girl out, what to do for a date, how a double date worked, etc. Now I feel like I somewhat get it, but that took a lot of dates between getting home and now to actually figure it out. I still don’t feel like I know a lot about dating, but I certainly know a lot more.

Man, I have some weird stories. I once randomly asked out my bank teller out because of the mere thought that she was cute and we flirted a little bit. That date was fun and she was a cool person. She was the first person I asked out on a second date, and turned out to be my first rejection for a second date as well. I learned how to take rejection and actually realize that she wasn’t denying me because something was wrong with me, rather she wasn’t interested. I think I’ve learned a lot since then that you are going to have a lot of first dates and a lot of those dates are not going to become second dates just because you or the other just aren’t interested and it is as simple as that.

Can I say something, don’t ask people out via text (unless it is something quick like ice cream I guess). Funny story, so there is this cute girl I met after I got home, I talked to her and few times and decided she was cool. We are in the same ward (for those of you who don’t know, that would be my church congregation). On a beautiful sunny day, I was outside studying and out of the blue I received a text message, it was from I number I didn’t recognized but the person stated her name in the text. So after a few quick messages I put the number in my phone with her name and left it at that. Several weeks later I decided “hey, it would be cool to go on a date with her.”, so I texted her asking her to go out with me that weekend with a large group of people in our ward, it was late at night and I imagine she was tired, but she responded yes. The day of the date I called to confirm to see if it would still work out. “Hello?” says a deep man’s voice “uh, hi, is *blank* there.” I said.

“Yes, this is him.”

“Oh, I must have the wrong number.”

After a quick search of the ward directory of phone numbers, I discovered the number I had was not from the girl I thought I had asked out, in reality it was from a guy who has the exact same name she had. Hilarious! After the shock and embarrassment I found out this guy thought I was inviting him to join the group date with his own date. Lesson learned: don’t text people to ask out on dates, you might be texting a man!

In the end I am still trying to figure out how the whole dating thing works and I am learning my lessons through messed up experiences. Dating is fun yet horrible at the same time. As I have heard from several married people “I am so glad I don’t have to date anymore.” As they should be, they already did their time going through all the drama to find their spouse. Another thing I heard from a friend “If my wife died today, I would stay single just so I could escape the horrible mess that is dating.” That’s encouraging! Oh well, right now I am enjoying dating and I am going to keep doing just for the sake of going on dates. Who knows, maybe my time will come that I can say with my beautiful wife in my arms “dating, thank goodness that’s over!”

Choices, choices

Life comes at you fast! Recently I have been thinking a lot about my life. What classes should I take next semester? Should I do an internship in Brazil or stick to the United States? Do I really want to spend $1,000 just for an LDS singles cruise? Out of all the girls I am crushing on, who should I get to know at this time, who should I hang out with, who should I ask out on my next date? (Dating consumes about 90% of my thought time). What should I do for homework at this very instant? Should I move out and have a social life, or should I stick it out at home and save thousands of dollars in a year? Why does life have so many questions!?

It is incredible to me how much life has to offer and how many options we can choose from. There are a lot of great and horrible choices, as well as good options and bad options. It seems we are always being put in to positions to make choices rather than being able to do every single thing we want. Life is so cruel making us make sacrifices in order to live it. I am not in any extreme life or death situation, but I sure feel like there are a lot of huge decisions on my plate at the moment, and all of them have immense benefits.

With regard to school I can take the business core right now and graduate in 2011, but if I do that I wouldn’t be able to do a joint Bachelor/Master program. Decision, graduate that much sooner and be rid of the curse of homework or add on a whole new degree of homework and graduate with a Master’s.

I have a few offers to take internships in Brazil, of I take them, I could progress in my desire to do international business, but then I run the risk of jeopardizing a promising future at my current job.

Dating, well, that is just a completely different animal (plans to write a future article on that). Let us just say, I do not know the first thing about women, so therefore I am having an interesting time learning the old-fashioned way, ie, going on dates and messing up a ton.

Moving out of my home in to a student apartment would increase my non-existent social life by a ton. But then I would have to spend a lot more money, sleep in a room with an entire other person, be away from my mom’s home cooked meals, and a nice quiet place to study.

Choices, decisions, options, what is up with that? Maybe if I restore Soviet Russia they can choose my life pursuits for me.

Well everyone, choose your options well, because there are a lot of them!

Stewart Falls and Growing Notion

I have blogged in the past, let's just say that was an interesting experience. I didn't ever find the motivation nor the desire to actually do it. I was an immature teenager following the trend of peers and friends. Now I feel like I have a purpose for it, that's why I have come back to writing a blog, I feel that there is a need for me to do it. I hope I can inspire some people, help out someone in situations similar to mine, or merely entertain someone staying at home with nothing to do (yes, even those procrastinators holding off the studies for a mid-term).

Stewart Falls

I just had an interesting time at a place here in Provo called Stewart Falls.* I went there with a blind date hooked up by my good friends. I recommend the location to everyone. The hike is an easy two-mile in-out hike with some impressive views of the Provo Canyon and the back side of Mount Timpanogos. Unfortunately we missed the mesmerizing fall leaves by a week, but it was still a fun hike and the peaceful nature of the area was tranquilizing. I am definitely going back for future events with friends or future dates.

Parties with Old Friends

I watched the BYU vs TCU game live on TV. That disappointing game was a 38-7 loss. That being said I was not the most excited person when I went to a friend's party I was invited to.

By the way, it was cool how I was invited. The hostess of the event didn't have my cell phone number as her primary contact number for me in her phone. So the mass-text she sent out went straight to my land-line rather than my cell phone. The text actually went through and it was delivered by a computer voice like an answering machine, it was actually reading what she had sent me. Cool deal!

Back to the story. I got there to see several people I have been friends with since high school (graduated in 2006). Several of the friends there I would consider my good hang-out friends from high school. They are great interesting people. But I had a notion while I was sitting on the couch alone coloring a picture (the hostess's family places coloring books and papers, etc on the coffee table with a bunch of markers for people to color, doodle etc). I noticed that I just didn't feel like I fit in with them much anymore. Like I said, they are great people and are fun, but my personality has changed enough from theirs that I don't feel the same kind of connection I once had with many of them. It just showed me how much people can change in three years (especially with a two-year mission there in the mix to Brazil where I served).

I don't think I can completely explain it, but I felt like I had nothing to say to them and they didn't really have anything to say to me. Several times I would join a group of these people and just listen to the conversation, realizing I had nothing to add. That isn't normal for me, I'm a talkactive person with a lot to say, so I felt really out of place.

I guess this is what happens as we get older and discover new interests and more about ourselves. What was once normal can then become different and can feel out of place. I am definitely going to continue to be friends with all of these people and hang-out with them, but I can tell that time has changed my friends and me (for the better of course). That is life, we change, what we need to do is appreciate what we have learned from our past experiences and continue to grow from them.

*Directions and information about Stewart Falls